Canceling Grandma: The Christian Cancel Culture
/Cancel Culture is nothing new.
Christians have been actively practicing it for decades. I am speaking from a lifetime of experience from within the fundamental evangelical Christian realm. The closest thing I can find to “canceling” in Scripture is from Matthew 5:29, “If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.”
There aren’t many one-eye Christians walking around, but there are plenty who reject their own children or family or boycott Disney, Target and Netflix. But the funny thing is, the same people practicing their version of “Biblical” canceling, as mentioned above, will rally around a Christian comedian, reality TV show personality, pastor or whoever really - because they said they were sorry for abusing someone oh, and they went to Christian counseling or therapy.
Christian cancel culture’s roots are deeply hypocritical.
The same people taking the “moral high ground” and boycotting Target because of their not gender segregated bathroom choices, Happy Holidays advertising or gay family ads, are at home abusing their families with their explosive anger and controlling tendencies.
The same people who won’t go to Grandma’s because she likes to watch “yucky” TV programs in front of the kids, are discovered to have porn on their computers or sexually abusing their own kin.
The same people protesting LGBTQ inclusive sex education in their children’s schools, are physically abusing their wives and children at home.
The same people who are cancelling their Netflix subscription because of child pornography are sexually abusing their own children at home - or turning a blind eye.
“So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment?”
Here are some examples of Christian canceling of which I am personally aware:
We don’t go to Grandma’s house because she will have on bad TV shows we don’t want our kids watching.
We don’t see my sister because she uses swear words, we don’t want our kids to see and hear such sinful things.
My brother is living with his girlfriend, we cannot expose our home and family to this immoral lifestyle.
Our son is gay, we no longer invite him to family gatherings or talk about him to our other children.
She accused him of rape, she’s a liar. We decided not to talk to her anymore.
We don’t shop at that store - they support the gay lifestyle and I won’t give my money to a place that promotes sin.
We don’t drink alcohol because it’s a sin and a gateway to pornography and debauchery.
Fast forward a handful of years and it comes out about those Christian cancelers that:
They’ve been sexually abusing their own family, for years.
They embezzled money from the church.
They had an affair with a family friend, from the church.
They are secretly gay themselves.
They are discovered to be pathological liars.
They have had multiple affairs and physically abuse their wife.
Their anger has chronically been out of control at home leading to fits of rage and violence.
They are caught visiting porn sites.
While in more recent days #MeToo and Black Lives Matter have helped raise awareness about some vitally important ethical and moral deficits in our society, I feel that merely cancelling people or businesses because they don’t agree with the current climate or your own beliefs isn’t solving the real problem. What awareness movements have show us is that through conversation, asking vulnerable questions and truly listening to those on the other side of the table we can begin to understand the why’s and initiate cultural transformation.
I’ve experienced too much of the fruitless and often hypocritically humorous Christian canceling in my lifetime. I’ve seen enough of angry Christians writing articles, speaking out on talk radio or their social media platform and screaming, “Read your Bible - we don’t believe in ________. It’s a sin! Boycott!”
Full-disclosure here: I do not participate in trending Christian boycotts or canceling.
It’s super easy to point fingers at blatant wrong - your heart rate goes up, you feel like you’re doing something that really matters. It’s super easy to jump on a bandwagon – whatever is trending on social media, the news or within your community – you become one of many voices calling out wrong-doing. You feel like you’re standing for the rights of the under-served, unheard and victimized.
Boycotts are part of cancel culture. It makes you feel good. It makes you feel justified. You got to make the choice and a statement. You’re standing up for a moral, perhaps Biblical truth. (How many little Baptist church kids never went to Disney World or had all their Disney VHS taken away because their family and church were boycotting them? For me that was Barbie, My Little Pony and Care Bears – too sexual and also they were allegedly demon possessed too.)
“You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
Most of us think we are good people. Most of us would probably rate ourselves a 9 out of 10 on the scale of being an overall good human being. But what about your uncontrollable anger? What about how you are abusing your own child? What about you are treating your spouse? What about your closet addictions or alcoholism or that lie you told at work?
People are forgetting, “judge not least ye be judged,” and have instead turned to “picking their own sins.” Literally, many evangelical Christians are leading sin-filled lives, but it’s OK, because their sin is not as bad as - being gay, having an affair, voting for someone who believes in abortion, rioting in the streets, adding to the moral breakdown of the family or whatever “sin” they interpret to being worse than their own. Christians are choosing to practice what sins they deem as acceptable.
Is this based on what their conscience can handle? What they can easily conceal? What their personal Biblical interpretation allows? Are they so full of pride and arrogance that they forget to check their own plank before casting a stone?
Why on Earth are Christians surprised when the same canceling tactics are used against them or something they believe in? If you want the world to change…if you want to help the church change…start by looking at your own heart first. Live a life worth imitating. Live a Gospel life. Live the life you say you believe is right.
Boycotts and canceling do nothing but make Christians look bad, stupid even, when those “canceling Christians” are the ones living duplicitous lives. You cannot keep your sin, your abuse, your evil hidden forever. People claiming Christianity have made a mess of things. Christian cancel culture may well have started what we know ain our world today.
Claiming a holy, set apart life and fighting sin by boycotting while canceling whatever you don’t agree with that “the world” is currently serving, does nothing but reek hypocrisy when you are hurting or abusing others, choosing to cover up your own sin and sneakily disguising your life as Christ-like. You too, should be cancelled, no matter what your title or position.
“But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”
Turn introspective and before you stop shopping, stop watching or stop buying something - cancel what is in your own life that is evil. In my experience, true cultural change happens when someone says, “Not on my watch,” and they draw and line in the sand. This transformation can start in your own heart, then to your family and spreading into to churches, schools, organizations and cities.
Let’s say “not on my watch” to hypocritical Christian cancel culture. It’s time for authentic, raw and yes, even naked Christianity.
Before you cancel Grandma or IKEA’s sweet storage solutions, solve the real problem - your own life.
Rebekah is not a licensed therapist or clinician. Any advice or opinions given on this site are strictly her own observation and insights based on personal experiences and study. It should in no way take the place of professional assistance.